Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Had the Surgery....

My sweet daughter Ashley is taking care of me!
So my friends...
Friday night after this last post....
I was feeling pretty rotten...
so I told the hubby...
to take me to the ER here in St George.

my blood pressure was 211/112
and guess what???
They did the surgery.

I am now at my daughter's recuperating.
Her and that sweet son in law of mine...
are sleeping on an air mattress
out in the living room...
so I can have their king size bed.
When I get home I will have to show you all
the sweet note this new son of mine
wrote to me while I was in the hospital.
On the front of it...
it said...
"Brownie Points"

Well...he has scored some of those....
that's for sure!

Saturday was one of the worst days of my life.
Sometimes you wonder how much 'one' 
should really share on a blog.
But I will just say this....
My parents who live in Colorado...
drove through and didn't even stop to see me.
Nor did they call.
 I still tear up to think about it.
I've worked hard at this relationship for over
5  years booking shows near them, 
so we could go and see them,
 sometimes even driving hundreds of miles
out of the way so I could spend time with them.

I thought things were better.
I guess they are...
as long as I am the one making the effort.

To say the least it broke this little girl's heart in two.

I can't imagine one of my kids being sick
and not being there for them.

So by day's end on Saturday...
I decided to let it go...
and to count the blessings...
of all my kids, their spouses,
my sweet grandkids
my wonderful husband
and true and tried prayer
warrior friend Nancy for
being there for me.

I do need prayers though.
I do not want to be bitter.
I just want acceptance.
I can't change people...
and make them feel something 
they don't.
I can only be grateful for all of the
wonderful people
God has put in my life to
love and care for me.

The Guitar Man left for home today...
but not before getting me a ticket
on a plane out of here Saturday.

My sweet friend Nancy and her hubby 
drove up from Vegas to see me
the first night I got out.
What would we do without faithful friends?
She brought me some 'vanilla' 
from her trip to Mexico.
Ooh Laa Laa...
its been so long
since I've been able to bake
with Mexican Vanilla.
It's the best, gals!!!

So now  I'm a restin' my body and soul....
gently .....
in His care...

Until Later...


  1. That's seriously high blood pressure!! Last time I had mine taken a few years ago it was 160/70.
    I have 'family issues' too but all you can do is your best and leave others to deal with their own conscience, if they have one.
    Best wishes for your recovery - you're in good hands!
    Teresa x

  2. So glad the surgery is done, over-with, kaput!!! and you are now well and truly on the mend! :-) So sorry about your Mom and Dad; I've heard it said that we spend our adulthood trying to "fix" our childhood...from the sounds of it, you've done what is necessary to keep history from repeating itself! Changing your family tree as evidenced by your relationship to your dd/sil is a blessing beyond words. Wise words about letting go; what you can't fix, the Lord can. I've prayed for you this morning and for your family!
    Mary Lou

  3. I'm glad you had the surgery. I was very concerned about you waiting.

    You stay resting in His care. I will pray that you don't allow a root of bitterness to grow. I know how hard it is when you have been hurt by someone you love so dearly. Keep your eyes on the cross and keep preaching the Gospel to yourself. That's what helps me....

  4. I hesitate to write this because you are going to get all kinds of advice, but here goes. I have a similar situation with my sister. Every effort I made ending up hurting, so it felt like I was hurting myself, so, years ago I did my best to let it go. I thought of it as a gift I gave her. She didn't have to have me for a sister. I still cry when I see those "sisters are friends" things, but it does help in the day to day.

  5. Oh John'alee. I hope you are feeling better soon. Not only in body, but in your heart as well. We just can't always understand why people are the way they are. Just know that your efforts are a blessing and even if they are not received, you are doing the right thing. Take care my friend.


  6. Hello from a New Friend In Michigan. I wish you a speedy recovery. Your daughter and grand baby looks great. Grand children truly are a gift from God. A very Happy and Peaceful Holiday Season to you all. Hugs Judy

  7. John'aLee,
    Bless you! It would hurt my heart too. Enjoy your cildren and your grandbabies. Know that you have friends that care for you! Glad you are on the mend.

  8. (((*hug*)))
    you're in the best care.
    your parents' limitations preclude them.
    so sad.
    they're missing out on relationship
    with a lovely daughter and family.
    i'm so sorry.
    i'm thankful though too - that you have dear friends. friends are sometimes closer than family. we've found that to be true.
    i'm also thankful for the care you're receiving from your daughter and son in love. how truly loving!
    and that baby - is that your grand baby?!
    make a list of all the things you're thankful for this day. dwell on that list.
    in the midst of heartache, you're being blessed.


  9. I'm glad to hear that surgery went well and you're now recovering surrounded by the people that LOVE you unconditionally. Focus on the blessings in your life as this will help your body heal. Here's a big old HUG to help ease all the pains away!

  10. Oh I know you will get posts saying people understand...but I am telling you that I truly understand!! I have given up on my parents...and you know what? I am so much happier because of it. When I first met my husband 3 years ago he really rode me hard about not talking to them, etc etc etc, then we went to a couple of sessions of marriage counseling. I had to talk about my past...and told the counselor that my husband is nagging me to make contact. She looked at him and said, "Look how many times they have hurt your wife over the years. Why would you want them to hurt her yet again.?" So...He's never said another word.
    My sister found me via facebook. She's much younger and I moved out when she was just a kid. It is hard sometimes when she posts pics of her family and kids having a great time with the parents, and them being wonderful grandparents...when I have three kids that they could care less about.
    You know how I look at it? My parents taught me by example how NOT to be a parent...so I'm an awesome mom (just ask my kids!).
    So, chin up and LET THEM GO! The Bible says that families would be separated for His names sake...so let God handle them.
    Sorry~sometimes I am bluntly honest! Hang in there

  11. Hi John'aLee... I am happy that you had the surgery and I will pray for you to have a speedy recovery... You should feel better in no time...Just take one day at a time.... Sounds that you have a wonderful children and friends to get you through this... I know just how you feel about your parents... I have had the same situation with my father... But, life goes on and I am thankful for the family I have and friends that I also have... :) On a better note I make my own vanilla... it is easy and if you want the recipe just let me know... I will never buy store bought vanilla again... It makes great Christmas gifts... :)
    Mya God look over you while you are recovering and Bless you :)

  12. Oh sweetie! Well, I'm glad you had the surgery - it sounded like it was necessary :( Glad it went ok and that you are safe and recuperating. I hope it's a quick recovery - just do what they say and we'll be saying prayers for you. And about the parents, I can say I understand a little (at least with my Mom - my Dad's been gone for 10 years). But now, my Mom is sick and I have to forgive and let go. It makes us better Mama's - all this experience - you know we won't make the same mistakes! Hang in there and know there's always someone thinkin' of you :)

  13. Oh my, what a week you've had! I'm glad you had the surgery and that it went well. It was worrying me that you would put it off too long and get really sick again. Yeah! no more of that pain...and I'm hoping you are healing well now from the surgery.
    I'll be praying for you about the family issues. I'm so sorry you are having to feel that pain at the same time as dealing with recovering from surgery. Hugs from me too.

  14. Well John'aLee, I guess the surgery wasn't a surprise, but it's good that you could hang on until St. George so your beautiful daughter could take care of you. You'll feel so much better once you're recuperated.

    As for your parents, I'm sorry. I'm sorry they don't understand what a wonderful daughter they have. While I know it breaks your heart that you've put so much effort into the relationship and they've blown you off, believe me sweetheart, the problem is them and not you. You can do everything right and still lose.

    Big hugs!

  15. Sweetheart so sad to hear of you needing surgery. That was certainly one massively high blood pressure, thats goodness the doctors reacted quickly. I am so sorry to hear of your parents not visiting and all of the hard work you have tried to make the relationship work. It tears at my heart to hear of this type of thing, parents are needed so much in so many ways but if its not to be then yes we need to be thankful for those we have. Thank goodness for your wonderful loving husband, children and friends. Keep them close to your heart and hold onto the memories of the good times with your parents but it sounds like its time for you to think of you and the positive. Look after yourself John A"Lee and as hard as it is don't stress about what will not be. You are a wonderful woman and know that within yourself so that you may heal and be happy. Big hugs and wishes for a speedy recovery from afar in New Zealand, hugs Deb

  16. Glad your surgery was a success! You will be up and dancing in no time at all. I also know what you are going through with your parents, well my side is only my mother! Me and my dad talk all the time ( he lives 1000 miles away) my mother lives 15 minutes up the road, and never calls, drops by, didn't even show up for her granddaughters graduation this year or send out birthday cards ( she is big on those) So I let it go, life is too short for me to dwell on something negative like that. Life goes on, and I am making sure it goes on happily. So it frees up more time to spend with those that truly want your company! I also now now how NOT to treat my kids, and they are both in college and neither want to leave home. So I pat myself on the back everyday for that.

  17. Oh my precious friend - I'm so glad you had the surgery and are now better, I'm so sorry to hear this about your parents. Fix your mind on your TRUE Father - Who loves you more than any earthly parent could. Climb up into His arms and let Him catch your tears. I think you've done wonderfully, trying to heal that relationship, you will have no regrets for not acting. Of course I will pray for you....bitterness grows like a weed and separates us from our Lord, I wouldn't wish that on anyone. I think you're a wonderful mum and wife, and a wonderful daughter no matter what your parents do. You're only responsible for your own actions, sweetheart...you can't change someone who refuses to change. You just remain your sweet self and take your hurt to the One who can heal it. And I will pray for you too.

    Gentle hugs, dear one....

  18. I never heard of blood pressure that high; I'm glad you're on the mend, surrounded by loved ones. So sorry to hear about your heartache about your parents. Best get well wishes and hugs to you!

  19. concentrate on those who love and respect you, we can't choose our family. I hope you are feeling better, take care x

  20. Oh, I'm so glad you are on the mend. A friend of mine had the same thing happen to her when she was visiting the States from Australia, it was dreadful for her, the pain, the drama and being so far away from home. My regard and love to you as you are recovering, don't worry about a thing, just rest.

  21. God will bring you joy, when you have the outlook you are working to have. I have a bit of sad history in my life with my family, too. I try to remember the blessings of my life and what I have now, instead of the sorrows. God wants us to rest in Him, and counting blessings is a great way to keep positive.

    It's a shame that your surgery had to happen during the move and away from home, but I'm sure you'll be thankful in days to come that it is a done deal. Get better, girl! You've got a lot more creating to do!

  22. I'm sorry about your parents, too bad they miss the gifts extended to them. Glad you had the surgury! Hope this means all the bad has happened in 2010 and 2011 is going to be awsome! you're in my thoughts and prayers. Claudia

  23. John'aLee, so sorry you have had this trouble. What a gem your daughter is to help you out in your time of need. My prayers are with you, Best Wishes! Hugs, -Cori

  24. You are so blessed to have a wonderful family....I wanted to cry for you when I read that about your parents....it is so hard to try and not be bitter or be hurt. We only have control over what we do, you are so right.

    My heart goes out to you....I can truly say, I understand.

  25. Just keep sending love out the universe about your parents and it will start to have an effect! So very glad that you are doing well!